Developer Profile: The Assholes

Developers in the gaming industry mostly seem to exhibit the same traits. You'll see developers talking about their games, and while they attempt to drum up excitement for their product, they seem to be humble, good natured, and all-around good guys (almost never girls). This personality can be attributed to most well known developers, such as Shigeru Miyamoto, Will Wright, Sid Meier, and even that ego tripping Peter Molyneux. Even though all of them will promise you that their game will be the physical manifestations of your wildest dreams, they still do a good job at coming off as humble entertainers, simply trying to bring some sunshine into your existence.

Then there are the assholes. Don't get me wrong, however, I don't mean to use the term in any negative way. Asshole is just a good word to describe these guys. They are loud, coarse, trashtalking jerks, something which I find refreshing in the industry. Below are the four biggest assholes in gaming development history that I could think of when I came up with the idea for this article.

David Jaffe

Is David Jaffe an asshole? The fact that he is on my list should say something on that effect, but if that isn't enough, just take a look at his picture.

Jaffe is known by the industry as a man who always speaks his mind, which pretty much boils down to meaning he says "fuck" a lot. Which he does, especially when speaking candidly about the game testing process and the people involved. Most people read about the stuff he says and think, "Man, that guy is an asshole." He certainly is, and God bless him for it. David Jaffe is perhaps the most honest man in the gaming industry, and won't let little things like "professional courtesy" or "manners" stop him.

Jaffe is a relative newcomer in the gaming industry, with his first big hit being Twisted Metal in 1995. Afterwards, he made Twisted Metal 2, then allowed Sony to piss all over his franchise, before he saved it with Twisted Metal: Black in 2001. Hist most recent games have been God of War, its sequel, God of War 2, and Calling All Cars. His work hasn't been extremely notable, but his name is generally known in the industry for his outspoken opinions and personality, which is actually somewhat of a misnomer. His personality is pretty much based on the fact that he HAS outspoken opinions. Most people who criticize Jaffe for stating whatever is on his mind, regardless of what it may be. A good example would be on Gametrailers.com, where he, as a Sony employee at the time, said he would have ditched the blu-ray drive to lower the price.

While many people criticize Jaffe for blabbing too much, I personally enjoy what he has to say. Instead of using every second of public speaking time to hype up his game, he talks about his honest opinions about the gaming industry. He will talk about anything, including his opinions on other peoples games, gamers themselves, and even the opinions of gamers on himself. As it turns out, he wishes he could be the type of person who everyone loves. Sorry Jaffe, you may want our love, but your still an asshole. While plenty of people will hate you for that, you will always have me as a fan.

Tomonobu Itagaki

When you think of game developers, you usually dont think of them as assholes. You certainly dont think of Japanese game developers as assholes. This probably comes from the standard Japanese steriotype of them being very reserved and polite. Tomonobu Itagaki is neither. He is an asshole.

Itagaki is the leader of Team Ninja, a development team of Tecmo. He is known for his work on the Ninja Gaiden and Dead or Alive series. He is better known for his outlandish personality. The think with Itagaki is that I almost don't believe he exists. If you look on most pictures of him, you will rarely see him with his sunglasses off, his leather jacket off, or his grim scowl off. If I tried harder, I probably could have found a good set of photos of him glaring at a camera with his middle finger stuck out. He seems to be that guy you avoid in a dive bar late at night, brooding over his whiskey straight, ready to fight anybody who looks at him. He's like a cartoon character, and a part of me refuses to believe people like him truly exist.

Itagaki certainly has strong opinions about games, especially the Tekken series. While he demerits the gameplay in Tekken, his motivations come from other factors. Tekken is a direct competitor ot Itagaki's series, Dead or Alive, but Itagaki maintains that his grudge is much more personal. In a radio commercial for Tekken, there are insulting remarks made about Dead or Alive and, apparently, Itagaki's family. Obviously he is very pissed about this, stating that he will retaliate with "nuclear missiles more than 100 times for that." Not many game developers talk negatively about other developers, but how many threaten another developer with 100 nuclear weapons? This man certainly has a lot of balls, as well as a good portion of hate in his terrible black heart.

Another group of people Itagaki seems to hate is gamers. If you attempted to play the recent Ninja Gaiden for Xbox, you understand. Ninja Gaiden is a hard game. Excessively hard for a reasonable human being, and if you take into account the game has been remade numerous times, with each remake getting HARDER, you can imagine Itagaki laughing at us for being pussies.

A cherry on top of the asshole sunday that is Tomonobu Itagaki is the sexual harrassment suit in 2006. Whether this has any merit or not has yet to be seen, but it certainly doesn't help Itagaki's case that he made a game which has a singular purpose of seeing girls jump up and down in bikinis.

John Romero

Imagine waking up on a Saturday morning. Upon entering the kitchen, you see your mom/girlfriend/roommate-who-cooks-food up already with breakfast ready. You sit down with coffee and breakfast, kicking back and relaxing, preparing for a leisurely day. You flip through the mail, finding your favorite gaming magazine. You flip through the pages, looking for reviews of your favorite games, when you suddenly see this. Suck it down, ya bitch.

You probably would think "That John Romero fellow certainly is an asshole." Most people who saw that ad thought the exact same thing.
Derek Smart